In Ramadan

Spouses- far, close

 

Norah Mohammad

 

Marital life looks like a straight track where man walks on, understand its clarity and it's straightening, so he keeps walking on relaxed.

Wife for example, when her marital life as straight track, understands her husband's character , what he likes , what he dislikes in general .His daily schedules , his customs and habits , the main features of his character .This understanding facilitate her life to avoid disturbance in scheduling , habits and customs.

Husband also when his wife is loveable , understand his habits , customs , organizes her life for his sake , no disturbance , His home will be a calm nest , where he can forget job preoccupations , and delight with his smiles and spirituals all the house.

Spouses may recognize life troubles and hardness whenever there is a sudden travel or finance shock or sickness, or instability in work, food or sleeping.

Changes in sleep, work, and sleeping times occur in Ramadan, followed by changing in character and habits. Spouses then, needs hard efforts to organize time and habits, and to utilize time for god, self, spouse and family.

Here are 7 points, for spouses, may them help in to maintain organization, and straight track in Ramadan.

DON’T DISTURB, I'M FASTING

It is a shout of anger, but this means, you didn't understand the moral intentions of fasting. Fasting is not for nerves burning or tension. It elevates spirits and soul, and modifies customs and habits, and habituates someone to control feelings and reactions and relaxation. And calmness and to promote your habits to higher level of morality and humbling. Wife should also control her temper and tongue, and keep calm and smile. In Ramadan where there is changing  in time and habits , family needs to sit together , where good talks and love smiles took place , where all debates respectfully and lovely .Spouse should assign a time after breakfast to sit with kids

Could you accept challenge? Let this month pass without troubles, for months and years coming after .In this month, devils will be handcuffed, so try to understand each other, and learn forgiveness, and liberality.

Obedience Blessing:

Ramadan is not a days of fasting , but it is for worshipping , prayer , praise , charity , and moral conduct , so make every moment of this month a river of favors and blessings .

Assist yourselves in obedience, encourage yourselves to worshipping, that reminding benefits the believers, it flames inert intentions and relays weak energies.

Don’t make your house looks like a cemetery .Worshipping should not be restricted in the Mosque, your lovely small nest should also be delighted with prayers, praise, reciting of Qumran, guidance, and advise. Be ware of human devils that become active during Ramadan, break fasting by stimulating the intuitions, spending time, they decided to double their efforts to substitute the handcuffed devils. Don’t be indulgent with them , don't give them time to spend in entertainment .It is disobedience which has an evil omen .One of the results is that it prevents a human being from obedience and keep him a way of favor doings, so chose a place for yourself , and you husband , should know that coming to the Mosque 5 times a day provide you with moralizing  and knowledge , so teach your wife and kids , guide them , they are your citizens  and you are the governor who advise , guide and care after them.

The results of obedience will be obtained in life before afterlife, as a self satisfaction, heart happiness, a life facilities and a good family. So, the spouses should shade their home with god obedience, bless and dedicated worshipping.

THIS IS YOUR REALM

Difference of times of meals, sleep and work , doesn't mean to allow disturbance in our life , this is your realm , try to organize schedules as possible as you could , don't stay up late at night , don't assign the day for sleeping an cause of fasting fatiguing. Did you find a merchant forget to maximize his sales during seasons peaks because he is fatigue.

Choose the suitable time for key meals, and other time for visits, and a time for relaxation, avoids spending time in nonsense, because you will not perform your worships nor achieve your daily duties.

UNDERSTAND YOUR COMPLEXIONS

At the first time wife may feel fear and tensioned to understand husband complexions, but at the second time will understand what he likes and dislikes. For example he may not like to talk with any one after shift in Ramadan, or may sleep away from kids hype , or prefer a  certain dish , or like to take his sahour at a certain  hour and dinner at another hour., so try , wife , to satisfy him and fulfill his relaxation and happiness .

And you , husband , remember that your wife has a hard work to do with kids , and house , so don't shout , or talk tough to her , and if she request something remember that it is your house , and your life , and if you feel you can not fulfill her request , apologize easy and kindly.

THE BEST OF YOU DO THE BEST FOR HIS FAMILY

Modesty is one of the properties of manhood morals, that a husband can help his wife in kids care and house duties. Cooperating with her will decrease her tension and give her a time for worshipping and god obedience.

Don't be selfish, isolated and reciting reading   Qumran  for hours , while your wife is preparing breakfast for your friends and arranging house and care after kids . You have to help her or at least by keeping kids a way from her during she works.

Wife should not exhaust her husband with many requests for many dishes, this may spend their time and loose the chance of worshipping, our slogan should be Hadeth ((few morsels, are only what a human being needs to survive  

RELATIONS WITH OTHERS

Ramadan is a chance to develop relations between families .first of all, relation should be realized with parent's .Make a shiny days by visiting parents, or pray for them. Have a nice blessed breakfast with them. Talk to them, take their advice and remember their favors.

I like very mush a friend of me , she prepare a lot of food and send it to her neighbors  , or   relatives .She gains of such behavior the reward of offering breakfast as well as the reward of the good relationship and making Muslims happy.

 

Mild breezes:

Let the spouses contemplate on the hadeth narrated by Om Salma (Prophet Mohammad -Gbph-was kissing while he was fasting.) and the hadeth narrated by Aisha (== He was the best in controlling craving

These are high grade morals of prophet,

These are soft touches, but a love breezes, sympathy looks, and good words flaps onto the soul, offer love and satisfaction, wash away life preoccupations and difficulties.

MAY GOD ACCEPT FROM US GOOD ACTS, AND MAY HE ASSIST US IN PRAISING AND WORSHIPPING.